Mum Does The Washing

https://joshuaidehen.bandcamp.com/track/mum-does-the-washing

«Mums explain the world, one article of clothing at a time

The world according to your mum doing the washing

Capitalism: your mum does the washing. You pay her a dollar. You get her to do your mates washing. Your mate pays you 50 dollars

Communism: your mum does the washing. You do the washing. Every night you salute a photo of your dad.

Socialism: your mum does the washing. You do the cooking. Everybody is happy, in theory.

Feudalismi: your mum does the washing and pays you tax

Colonialism: you barge into mum’s room. Claim you “discovered” her room. Dump your dirty clothes on the floor

Fascism: your mum does the washing And you are obsessed with with her nose

Liberalism: you watch your mum do the washing and feel really really bad. “Something must be done” you say. Something may or may not get done

Libertarianism: Your mum does the washing. You believe you did the washing

Religion: your mum does the washing. You thank god

Atheism: your mum does the washing. You make a 12 part YouTube video demanding peer reviewed evidence she did, in fact, do the washing

Zionism: you made your mum live inside the washing machine and she got dizzy from the spinning which made her vomit and you point at that vomit and call it antisemitism

Americanism: your mum does the washing. It’s in the constitution. END OF DISCUSSION

Mansplaining: your mum does the washing. You tell her how best to do the washing. You have never done the washing.

Same sex marriage: Your mums do the washing.

Patriarchy: your mum doesn’t exist. The washing is mysteriously done

Terfism: your mum doesn’t want your other mum doing the washing because genitals and stuff

Polling: there’s a 70% chance you will do your washing on Saturday night Come Sunday morning it was 100% done by your mum

Africanism: you go 2 bennys house bennys mum does the washing You ask your mum why she doesn’t do the washing You do not survive the night

Feminism: your mum insists you grow up and do your own washing

White feminism: your mum hired a woman of colour to do the wash

Male feminism: that one time I did the washing told everyone I did the washing I blogged about it I bragged about it Took a selfie Insta story I went on oprah Won an Oscar Went on fort nite And did a dance I’m an ally Hashtag me too

Egalitarianism: that one time you did the washing is proof its all equal and no one needs feminism any more

Hip Hop: everyday im hustling/ every day I’m hustling/ when I bring the basket/mama put the washing in

Narcissism: You look good in the clothes your mum washed

Surrealism: the washing does your mum»